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Monogamous Mike

I’m Mike and I’m Monogamous. People have asked me if Aaron and I are monogamous. I would never ask anyone that same question, straight, gay,or good friend. I don’t think it is anyone's business. But, yes we are monogamous. I could never imagine loving someone as much as I love Aaron or ever in my wildest imagination think I would ever want to sleep with someone else.

MIke on his terrace.

We probably discussed this ass backwards as we do many things. That just seems to be our way and so far it has worked out for us. After we were engaged we decided we would be monogamous. It is probably better to have that discussion before you are engaged. Funningly enough it really was not a discussion as we both wanted it so there was really nothing to talk about. Maybe at some point I will ask Aaron what his reasons for wanting it were.

Before I explain being monogamous I do have a few exceptions where I could see us changing our minds. I have never been in an, ”age gap,” relationship before and do anticipate a point where I might be giving Aaron the thumbs up to play around. I expect if what I have read is true my sex drive drive will most likely drop. If no medication will help and we are happy, if Aaron wanted to play with someone for the night I hope I would be okay with it. Another case might be if either of us became infirm in some way that we were not able to be sexual with each other.

When we decided to get married Aaron was a lot more experienced than I was at his age. I was actually quite happy about this. He had done so much and been able to try so many different things. I will never worry that he was too young to marry because he felt he missed out. I hope he doesn’t either. He was really quite a slut.

Picture of Mike and Aaron's wedding rings.

This is the first relationship I have been in where my partner and I discussed being monogamous. In past serious relationships I tried to be, but we never talked about being monogamous or being able to see other people. My guess is these were sensitive topics and we were not very good at talking. No wonder they all ended. I would advise any couple to discuss difficult issues and the way they feel about them. The relationship will either improve or they will find out earlier they don’t belong together and not waste each other's time.

I always tried to remain monogamous because it was ingrained in my head at such an early age. There were one or two times I strayed. I always felt bad about it. It would occur when we were fighting or going through a bad spell and I would run for comfort to someone else. Not right but that was me at the time.

The fact that I am monogamous with Aaron has nothing to do with what was taught to me as a child. It has nothing to do with what I think is right or wrong. It has nothing to do with our agreement. Pure and simple my feelings for him are so great it would just never occur to me to sleep with anyone else.

Gay couple, Aaron and Mike in Belfast.

All I ever want is to be in bed next to Aaron, having sex, cuddling, sleeping or just laying next to him. Maybe I have deluded myself but I cannot believe Aaron feels anything but the same way I do. I am sure millions of people feel the same way I do when they get married and maybe it changes for them, but this is not going to change for me.

Although we have only been together in Ireland for a year and a half, every day my feelings for him grow stronger. In so many of my other relationships I could sense the bonds between us weakening when we had disagreements or discussions. I would stow the argument in the back of my head saying okay another reason this isn’t going to work.

Aaron and I have never had what I would consider a big argument or drag out fight. My tendencies to be an anal asshole gets on his nerves sometimes, while his insistence that we don’t waste electricity get on mine as he is the one who never turns off the lights. When we have had sensitive or delicate issues to discuss we always seem to grow closer with more understandings of ourselves and our relationship. It is such a strange experience to find that the more honest and vulnerable I am with Aaron the bigger a hard on I get for him. I feel like I am shedding layers of myself and with each layer I get a bigger hardon.. It is one of the sexiest feelings in the world. From the first time we met I thought he was the sexiest most beautiful man inside and out and he only gets sexier and more beautiful everyday.

Gay couple, Aaron and Mike having fun.

I always hear about open relationships and how many gay couples have them. If it works for them that is great. As far as I am concerned I have the best. Why would I want someone else to fuck with physically or mentally? I never thought I would be getting married because I wanted so much from a relationship. Now that I have it, all I want to do is put every bit of energy I have into this relationship.. I believe Aaron does too. If either of us were sleeping with someone else I don’t think we would be able to give 100 percent to our relationship. I also believe you might be able to fuck someone once without having a relationship but the second time you fuck with them you are building ties of some kind and that is a relationship.

Often times on our Blog a topic will hit us about what we want to write about without really having an idea where it will go or if it will go at all. Monogamy was like that. The word popped up in my head. I am not sure why, but it started me thinking about it.

Gay couple, Aaron and MIke enjoying their terrace.

I don’t want to speak for Aaron but I will. At this point in our lives monogamy is the best thing in the world for us. I hope with all my heart it stays that way. If monogamy is not working for us I hope we try and figure out what is wrong with our relationship before we see other people. Too often I think people look for the easy solution, not always the one that requires work. I don’t want finding comfort or a fuck with someone else to be part of a solution to a problem we are having.

I never want to fuck up the most beautiful wonderful thing that ever happened to me. It was something I never expected would happen in my life and I will cherish and treasure Aaron and our relationship forever. Life is hard and maybe I am weak but I do not want to do anything to make it harder. I realize after writing this I am not monogamous because of the agreement Aaron and I have, rather because I want to put every bit of effort I can to make Aaron the happiest person in the world and our marriage the best there is. Call me corny, stupid, old fashioned but that’s just me. What we have is the best and I will not do anything to jeopardize it.

Mike and Aaron.


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